Do you want to know what really gets your day up? I'll tell you. Have you ever had dinner with two people you had never met and found out that you had all slept with the same kid, and that same kid is also joining you for dinner and will spend the meal acting completely awkward because he thinks he's the only person who knows and wants to hide it? What a maroon! He's been to college for three weeks, and already three random people can get together and discover they've ALL seen his protruding tailbone and oddly-shaped penis. Which brings me to my next point...
Men should be forced to wear signs saying "Beware! I may be attractive and chaming, but my penis is gross, miniscule, actually a vagina, or otherwise dysfunctional." Or just keep it in your pants. Seriously.
I'm superficial. Welcome to my blog.
In conclusion, if you're an 18-year-old gay guy, you might as well go ahead and die.
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