You can tell I'm getting fat because my belly button is like 3 inches deep.
I can stick my finger in there up to the first knuckle.
I need a Craigslist boyfriend with a fetish. "Roan cow seeks masculine soccer-playing model/massage therapist. Must enjoy spleunking, Doritos, and body contact because there is no escape."
See, Brian? Told you I'm not shallow.
ReplyDeleteomg, that picture is gross!!
ReplyDelete(not that you are gross, and I don't believe you are fat at all, you think you are fat because you hang out with me all the time - I have that effect on people! but just when you focus and enlarge a picture like that it's kinda scary!)
Wow, that's fantastic because I didn't focus on or enlarge anything. That's just what I look like. THANKS FOR THE SELF-ESTEEM BOOST OMG THIS FRIENDSHIP IS OVER!
ReplyDeleteHun, you aren't fat. I've seen pictures. This must be a bad angle is all. Hell, you could take a picture of any part of my body and it would appear akin to this.
ReplyDeleteYou're a hottie.
aww, don't be mad, you can laugh at my chicken bone like ribs anytime you want~ ;)
ReplyDeletethis gives a new meaning to navel gazing
ReplyDeletewait, no, it's the old meaning
Um, how long are your fingers?
ReplyDeleteIf just the first knuckle is 3", your fingers must be like a foot long. I'm not sure if that's sexy or scary.
I'm going with 'both'.
Anon. -- Haha! Navel gazing! You're my favorite.
ReplyDeleteHavoc -- You have belly buttons all over your body?
Bagel -- I am the lovechild of Mr. Burns and Count Olaf.
um, you seriously need a wax job.
ReplyDeletexo,
wDL
Oh, bitch! I am aghast at your impudence! Just because I embrace my boyhood and don't remove ever tiny hair from every crevasse in my body like some trussed up tart does not mean I have grooming and hygiene issues!
ReplyDeleteYou have hair in your crevasses?
ReplyDeleteYou're not supposed to get that til you're retired.
You're not helping!
ReplyDelete