I was at this housewarming party Saturday night, and it was super fun, right, and I iced cupcakes and drank lots of things and met all these people and most of them went to Bard, y'know the college, which apparently is awesome because it churns out awesome people.
But I'm all embarassed. Anyone who's seen Napoleon Dynamite knows it's important to have skills, and I actually got into a conversation with a German girl and an Icelandic girl about skills and parties and dating and why and how and it was silly but we knew it was silly so we're not superficial or anything.
Anyway, I'm really embarassed because there was this old 8-bit Nintendo there and I was drunk and people were playing Mario, and I said "Oh you suck" a lot because I like to harass people who are bad at video games even when I'm not any better. It's just fun.
But it so happens that I am better at Mario and I can finish it in about 6 minutes, and so they told me to play and I did and I kicked its ass, so I'm embarassed because then everyone at the party thought I was so good because I spend lots of time memorizing video games and no matter how much I insisted that I have an actual life and no matter how cool they said it was I know they were judging me secretly. Except the German girl, I think she was genuinely impressed and she was pretty so I told her.
So the moral of this blog is that no matter how many skills you have, you're not gonna get dates if they involve video games.
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