The Da Vinci Code: Yet to be decoded

My boss lent it to me, so despite my avoidance of it for all this time, I am actually going to read The Da Vinci Code.

It's not the popularity that has heretofore dissuaded me from reading the novel. I mean hello, biggest Harry Potter fan ever! Rather, it was the popularity mixed with how it's taken so seriously. The intellectual elitist in me immediately recoiled when it noticed all the publicity that was attached to a book everyone was reading (i.e. popular fiction.) I'm one of those awful people who hates seeing James Patterson, Stephen Coonts, and Tom Clancy mixed into the 'Literature' section at Borders. So all the attention The Da Vinci Code was getting pretty much made me think "Wow, this will probably turn into a Tom Hanks movie," and I immediately dismissed it. Ok, maybe I didn't really use Tom Hanks' name.

But now I have it, and I want to see what all the fuss is about. Hell, maybe it will be more than cheap entertainment given far too much billing. I'm not getting my hopes up, but I know good writing when I see it. It's my job.

Flipping through the book, however, the first thing I noticed was that none of the chapters are more than 5 pages long. Dan, my man, I hope this isn't some cheap way to make this fast-paced, action-packed thriller seem more... fast-paced. Also, there's italics on almost every page. I can use italics here because this is a retarded blog. You're writing a book. Italics is lame. You'd better have a good reason. I guess I'll find out this afternoon.

So here we go. I'd say I'm approaching this with an open mind, but my full Jewish nose needs no more length. And if you think I'm a judgmental asshole for talking shit about popular things being taken too seriously when they're actually crap and also about popular fiction in general, you are correct! Well done. Five points to Gryffindor.