Yeah, I was stood up last night.
Dinner was supposed to be at 8, right, and we confirmed this when we spoke on the phone at 7. I got there early and waited and waited and waited and called and waited and at 8:30, I left a message "It's Scott. It's 8:30. I'm going home."
Oh, and I don't know if you noticed, but it was freezing outside last night. People were passing me by, and some of them passed me a second time thinking "I bet that loser got stood up."
I don't feel bad about myself, it's not like this was some hot date with a gorgeous muffin I've been in love with since the third grade (Billy, if you're out there, I still love you!). Plus, he asked me out, so it's not like he thinks I'm boring or stupid or unattractive. (He'd be wrong if he did.)
But you just don't stand people up, am I right? I don't care if your puppy died. I don't care if a hideous alien fetus just busted through your father's ribcage and you need to hurry over and apologize for never being the type of son he wanted. Send me a freaking text message, it takes two seconds: "Cn't makf it, sry." Don't leave me standing there until my toes fall off.
There's a chance he may have fallen asleep because he had been travelling earlier in the day, but bitch, that doesn't cut it either! First of all, rude. Second of all, it's been 20 hours! You're awake by now so apologize.
Once again, it's a fucking lawyer that ends up being a total dickhead to me. You'd think I'd have caught on by now. I've gone out with 6 lawyers this past year. Four of them have managed to seriously piss me off. The other two were European (a Brit and a Greek), and I'm guessing this is no coincidence. My lawyer friend in CT has warned me for the past 3 years "Don't date lawyers we all suck" and I'm gonna start listening.
...but they make so much money...
UGH, whatever, screw you all. I'll find a Jewish doctor. Are you happy now, mom?