Something From the Comments

Spencer says:

I thought we weren't allowed to call him Wine Store Guy anymore! And blogging about Latte Boy provides so much more drama and angst. Your relationship with Wine Store Guy appears to be without much tumult right now, so maybe it's better that you aren't blogging about him? Just sayin'. :P

The Blog is a place of pseudonyms, but thanks for revealing that I've been talking about him and calling him that for so long that I had to instruct people to use his real name.

FINE YOU GUYS I WILL BLOG ABOUT WINE STORE GUY JESUS CHRIST!

We met because he works at the wine store right off the subway, and I started playing my creepy obsessive game where I would go in and buy wine for no reason just to see if he was there. Then I would talk to everyone about "OMG Wine Store Guy" all the time, and if I was blogging then you'd all have vomited so much but always come back for more just like now.

Then one day I realized he was too sexy, charming, and intelligent for my game, so he graduated to Legitimate Crush and then disappeared for 3 months before I could do anything about it. That's when I used the internet to reach new depths of sociopathic privacy-violation, marked my calendar with what I determined to be the date of his last performance at the summer opera company with which I found out he was singing, and waited for him to return to New York.

The date passed, he didn't show, and I was left alone with my feverish, pathetic imaginings until I went to one of those free Met Opera screenings with Spencer (above, who does not get a pseudonym because when it comes to Google spiders, he has no fear) and Wine Store Guy was there, but inaccessible. He was lucky enough to leave the terrible opera early, and I was not, so I Facebooked him, we started going out, and it turns out he's somehow even better than the fake version I had been making up for so long.

Lastly, his other pseudonym is C. C. Babcock.

Ok are you happy? Now you know the story. The title of this blog is "Story of Wine Store Guy" unless you are Wine Store Guy, in which case the title is "How You Got Saddled With a Creepy Psycho and Didn't Find Out Until You Read His Shitty Blog".